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Novocastrian Tales

The Dreamtime

By |January 4th, 2020|Categories: Fictional|

The new Prime Minister of Australia is an Aboriginal woman. She has a vision for her country that is beyond politics. Her dreaming comes from the land itself. Her dreaming is informed by the smoke and fires, by the kookaburras and koalas, by the kangaroos and goannas and all of the Australian native flora and fauna, including those who are no more. She hears the whispers of her ancestors in the wind-blown leaves and the cry of the currawong, the rain bird, and she hears the croaky, dry voice of drought, and she makes her decision. She will lead. She

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Koala Town

By |December 24th, 2019|Categories: Fictional|

Santa’s sleigh is barely visible through the choking smoke. Santa is wearing a respirator over his flowing beard, and he can’t see where he’s going. Santa’s sleigh is being guided by snoutnav. Chester the Jester is an unusual reindeer. He’s a shape-shifter like his companion Merlin the Magnificat. Chester and Merlin could become the smoke, but today they’re on a special mission for Santa. They have become reindeers. Chester is a koala-sniffing dog, and Merlin is a Maine Coon cat. Santa has thought long and hard: would the koalas appreciate a new Prime Minister? But Santa’s sleigh is empty. Perhaps

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Lady Buckethead and The Goddess of Storms

By |November 3rd, 2019|Categories: Fictional|

I knew that Joe was dead. The hospice sister had phoned me at 3am. I ducked into the chapel five hours later to have a word with the god that Joe didn’t believe in. Morning sun filtered through the stained glass. A rainbow of primary colours refracted and reflected an old man’s death. Nobody really knew Joe. I certainly didn’t. He had no living relatives and no apparent friends. Joe was one of those homeless characters who slept rough under a Moreton Bay fig in Lambton Park. I didn’t know the significance of that fig. I didn’t know the significance

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A Murder

By |October 27th, 2019|Categories: Fictional, Uncategorized|

When Susan and I arrive at Planet Fitness, a murder is not premeditated. We are too busy meditating on number plates in the car park. We are parked between BBC and CNN. Clearly our arrival is newsworthy on this foggy fitness morning. Susan enters the Quonset building, her quest for fitness uppermost in her mind, never dreaming that she might never see me again. My daily fitness walk begins and ends with Susan; till death us do part. A pair of common grass parrots, hopping like escaped budgies, seek to punctuate my starting-block stillness. Their fear is tempered by curiosity.

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Rotunda Fortunae

By |June 2nd, 2019|Categories: Fictional|

I’m not a Lambton lad or lass, but I am a Lambton legend. Indeed, it could be said that the entire township rotates around me. I’m 128 years old, but I long to be 228 years old, and, to understand that longing, you’d need to know of what happened during my 28th year. It’s a

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Fici Delendae Sunt – The Figs Must Be Destroyed

By |January 31st, 2018|Categories: Fictional|

A Novella for Sam and The Beast Dramatis Personae Sam a dog with an unknown past Cicero a cat with a well-known past The noble senators readers and listeners of this wagging tale The Laman Street figs fourteen living as one Veritas the goddess of truth The bottlebrush a urinary associate My master Buddhist owner of Sam and Cicero Mother Teresa a saintly chihuahua, friend of Sam King Phillip a renowned canine tonsurist The Diet Squad a legion of starving dog-catchers Diet Squad dullard a very dull chap with a shiny heart Labrador a passing distraction Lusty poodle a passing heat

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Welcome

By |May 1st, 2017|Categories: Educational, Personal|Tags: |

Welcome to the Novocastrian Tales page from Tusk Productions. This page is named in honour of our national bestseller Novocastrian Tales. In some senses, we are redefining the words Novocastrian and Tales to mean whatever we want them to mean at any particular point in time. Defining terms is a very mathematical construct. In this case, Tales will be defined as an independent variable. Expect the unexpected!

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Are you running late from the shower?

By |May 1st, 2017|Categories: Educational, Personal|

I was standing in line in the foyer of the Great Hall waiting for the doors to open for our latest university mathematics exam. I was VERY NERVOUS. I did not know what I know now with respect to studying mathematics, and I most certainly did not know what I know now about sitting for mathematics exams.

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Free Books For Teachers

By |May 1st, 2017|Categories: Educational, Personal|

In my childhood memories, the rather tiny Lambton Library is huge. I would ride my ancient pushbike down through Lambton Park as though I were a famous fighter pilot, rest the rusting bike against the old weatherboards of the library and then rush into its hallowed domain in search of the latest Biggles book.

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